A computational model is developed to analyze magnetohydrodynamic (MHD) squeeze-film flows featuring an electrically conducting fluid subjected to imposed magnetic and electric fields. The model is based on the so-called MHD Reynolds equation for squeeze-films—an extension of the classical hydrodynamic Reynolds equation. A complete derivation of the MHD Reynolds equation is performed by applying thin-film and quasi-steady assumptions to the Maxwell/Navier-Stokes system coupled by the Lorentz force. The resulting equation is a two-dimensional and variable-coefficient Poisson equation for pressure, which reduces to the purely hydrodynamic form in the limit of vanishing Hartmann number. A geometric calculus formulation facilitates the reduction of the mathematical system into two dimensions, which is a challenge in standard vector calculus due to the cross product. The model permits realistic geometrical representations of the constraining squeeze-surfaces, and we demonstrate the use of a multi-variate Weierstrass-Mandelbrot fractal to numerically generate scale-invariant surface roughness profiles. Ultimately, the governing equation is solved with the Galerkin finite element method. Several numerical examples are conducted to highlight some of the model’s capabilities. MHD forces—as well as the roughness, geometry, and topology of the squeeze surfaces—are shown to significantly influence flow characteristics.